Bridesmaids, Inspired

Traditionally, most brides have expected their wedding party to match from hairstyle to shoes. This can be difficult, however, if your entourage is scattered geographically or includes those (like your ski-bum sister) with budget constraints. Alternately, maybe matching isn't your style and you're feeling good about your friends' modes of self-expression.  


Happily, there's an easy way to organize your group and perhaps prevent that bridesmaid mutiny you've been dreading. 

You probably already know what colors you love and the kind of atmosphere or theme you want for your big day. There are dozens of magazines, online retailers, and websites for finding inspiration. Planning my own wedding, I spent a lot of time on blogs such as  Well Wed, Ruffled Blog, Style Me Pretty, and Martha Stewart Weddings. Once you know what you're looking for, it's time to give your bridesmaids the tools they need to create an outfit.

For my England-meets-New England wedding, I knew I wanted antiqued colors, rustic textures, and vintage details like gloves or headpieces. Creating an inspiration board was an enormously helpful way to solidify my vision and share it with my wonderful women. Here's mine from 2011, using Style Me Pretty's Inspiration Board Tool:

 

 I included the Etsy seller's original photo of my wedding gown (bottom left corner), so my bridesmaids knew what I'd be wearing.

After distributing my inspiration board, I sent links to suggested dresses and accessories as I spied them in my internet travels. As you can imagine, communication is vital: you want to be available to answer questions and provide support - without channeling your inner bridezilla (like your friends thought you might).

It's natural to worry, especially if you're Type A like me. From our conversations, I was afraid my bridesmaids would show up in '80's regalia, a white dress, or a slip. Keep the lines open, stay calm, and remind yourself why you love these people. Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself if you encounter a rebel in the group, but be willing to let go, too.

If you know what you want and communicate it effectively, your bridesmaids will look and feel great when the day arrives. Plus, they'll thank you for letting them be comfortable (in style and budget), and who knows: you might stay friends after all. :)

     
What are your thoughts: how do you feel about bridesmaids choosing their own dresses? Any success or horror stories you care to share?

(Photographs by Roger Katz and Allison Gould)